Newcastle Have Just Made The Easiest £100 Million In Their History

Marseille have just announced the official permanent signing of Florian Thauvin for £10 million which tops up our 2016 transfer money received to a cool £100 million bag your £20 Free Bet AND Free £5 Bet every week with Exclusive Partner William Hill HERE!

Sissoko, Wijnaldum, Townsend, Janmaat, Cisse, Cabella and now Thauvin have all signed for other clubs since pre season to take the edge off relegation and missing out on Premier League money. Throw on top Steven Taylor's £40k and Coloccini's astronomical £75k a week has also been stripped off the wage bill, it's not been bad business at all.

We have obviously invested a lot of that money back into squad with Ritchie and Gayle having decent size fees but investing it wisely has been the real genius behind our transfer work.

Promotion back to the Premier League looks well on course with a squad full of depth with quality in every position. Gayle out injured? Mitro will come in with a brace. Diame dropped? Perez will come in with a brace. Ritchie out? Atsu will come in to score a winner. Anita or Yedlin. Clark or Mbemba. Hayden or Colback. The list goes on.

In fact, our squad is so deep we have hardly seen the likes of Lazaar, Hanley or Murphy. All full internationals when fit. Amazing for a Championship club. Selling off the players that didn't care about out football club or were just expensive dead weight is the easiest £100 million we have ever made. Did you see £30 million Sissoko's performance for Spurs in the Champions league on Wednesday? Embarrassing.

Follow me on Twitter @ToonBano and don't miss out on your £20 Free Bet AND Free £5 Bet every week with Exclusive Partner William Hill HERE!

Newcastle First Choice Winger To Sign For Another Club In January?

Yoan Gouffran has been on fire this season. Our record with him in the side so far reads zero losses. Zero. This form has brought the attention of clubs around his native France, specifically Lille, as unfortunately for us his contract is set to expire at the end of the season. So with this, he can sign for any foreign club on a pre-contract in January and leave for free in the summer bag your £20 Free Bet AND Free £5 Bet every week with Exclusive Partner William Hill HERE!

So Newcastle may even take the opportunity to sell him in January and get some money out of him. This is highly unlikely however as promotion is the be all and end all this year, so a million or two for him wouldn't do us any favours. Especially seeing how indispensable he is all of a sudden...who would have thought it?!

When he lost his squad number to Matt Ritchie before the season started, the writing looked on the wall for him to be on his way out. The determination he has shown to not just play his part in the squad but make the left wing position his own has been great to see and totally unexpected. Fair play to him.

He has put many ex-players who jumped ship almost immediately to shame...

Follow me on Twitter @ToonBano and bag your £20 Free Bet AND Free £5 Bet every week with Exclusive Partner William Hill HERE!

Unbelievable Story Of How Alex Ferguson Acting As Keith Gillespie's Agent Ripped Off Newcastle

Read an interesting story of the day when Keith Gillespie signed for Newcastle back in 1995. The Northern Irishman didn't have an agent at the time so his mentor and manager Sir Alex Ferguson acted on his behalf to negotiate his contract to sign for us. Don't miss out on your £20 Free Bet AND Free £5 Bet every week with Exclusive Partner William Hill HERE!

Gillespie was on around £250 a week at Man Utd and when Newcastle agreed to sell them Andy Cole for £7million, Kevin Keegan insisted on having the flying winger as part of the deal. So when Keegan along with some Newcastle directors and Gillespie were set to meet to sort out his contract, Fergie went along too acting on behalf of his Class of '92 graduate.

The Scottish cheat was on top form once negotiations began as he blagged that Gillespie was on £600 a week. Not only this he managed to get our genius directors to stump up £1,200 a week in order to seal the deal. Unbelievable. You would think we were absolutely desperate to sell Cole to be fooled into such nonsense so easily.

So we lost Andy Cole and got ripped off on Gillespie. Whether this transfer was actually a good thing in the end is up for much debate on Tyneside. After all, without the sale of Cole we would not have brought in Ferdinand. The 95-96 season would never have happened and we wouldn't have had such great memories of Big Les dominating the Premier League to within a whisker of us being Champions. Plus everything that happened off the back of this like Asprilla's hat-trick with Gillespie being a major part of that game or Shearer choosing us over Man Utd for the next 10 years.

Then there's the other argument of, well we didn't win anything and Man Utd with Andy Cole in their side did end up as Champions in '96, he also went on score plenty of goals against us and who knows maybe Gillespie would have kept Beckham out of the team and the ex-England captain wouldn't be what he is today. Now there's a thought.

Pros and cons on both sides but fact is facts and what happened, happened. Good or bad.

What wasn't a fact was how much Fergie told us Gillespie was on and happily ripped us off. Fergie telling porky pies and getting away with it? there's a fact. Rafa would agree.

Follow me on Twitter @ToonBano and be sure to get your £20 Free Bet AND Free £5 Bet every week with Exclusive Partner William Hill HERE!

Mitro's On Fire! This Is Rafa's Team To Burn Up Brentford Tomorrow!

We have had enough of Diame playing as the No.10 over past couple of months. He can't finish or create so what's the point?

Mitro has been chomping at the bit to get out there and play, so since he bagged a brace for Serbia the other day, Rafa must surely let him loose against Brentford.

The team below is capable of taking all 3 points and edging us closer to the top of the league!
Don't miss out on your Free £20 Bet AND Free £5 Bet every week with Exclusive Partner William Hill HERE!

Christian Atsu scored the winner versus Rotherham so would be unlucky not to start, however Ritchie is first choice and Gouffran hasn't been on the losing side yet all season. That's some record.

Follow me on Twitter @ToonBano and Don't miss out on your Free £20 Bet AND Free £5 Bet every week with Exclusive Partner William Hill HERE!

WATCH: Rafa Completely Burns Mitrovic In Training! But Will Start Him Tomorrow

Rafa got his skills out in training as he attempts to teach Mitro a thing a two on how to take somebody on. He pretty much burns him alive to the point Mitro's on fire...well, hopefully for Saturday! Don't miss out on your Free £20 Bet AND Free £5 Bet every week with Exclusive Partner William Hill HERE!

Mitro scored a brace for the Serbs in International week so is red hot at the minute and raring to go, despite being mugged off by Rafa. Our Spanish boss will surely now release him into the wild against Brentford on Saturday as we finally play with two strikers on the pitch from the start.

We have been subjected to Diame playing in the hole for most of this season and it hasn't been a success, despite the team winning most games in the end. We currently sit 3rd in the league which isn't a great return after 11 games giving the poor standards of the Championship in relation to our squad.

Sticking Mitro up front with Gayle is surely the way forward from now on, especially at home....even if he gets burned now and again!

Follow me on Twitter @ToonBano and Don't miss out on your Free £20 Bet AND Free £5 Bet every week with Exclusive Partner William Hill HERE!

More Killer Clowns! Steve McClaren Is Back!

Derby County are insane. They have finally parted company after weeks of delay with the strange Nigel Pearson, they then interview candidates to take over the task of promotion to the Premier League and have decided on their man. That man is....Steve McClaren. Erm...what?

Don't miss out on your Free £5 Bet every week with Exclusive Partner William Hill HERE! Not only did he completely fail in his 6 months at NUFC by relegating the football club after huge funds were spent on the team, he failed to bring promotion to Derby County the season before. He was sacked after finishing outside the play-offs, despite topping the table at one stage with promotion looking guaranteed. They imploded beyond repair and he rightfully got the boot.

He then somehow managed to swindle himself a Premier League job with us off the back of this disaster, in which the team he was in charge of didn't even have time to implode as they were useless pretty much from day one. Why in the hell Derby have decided to go back to this man is beyond any reasoning whatsoever.

Why the hell would you go back to the man who proved he wasn't up to the task of promotion, when a club like Derby would have a long list of potential suitors? It would be like us hiring back McClown after Rafa, if he for some reason departed St James'. Mental.

There is a craze around at the minute of clowns wandering around the streets and scaring people...the streets around Pride Park is the scariest one yet.

Do the Derby County directors have no memory to speak of or have chosen to bury their heads in the sand? Talk about Ostriches eh Nigel...?

Follow me on Twitter @ToonBano and Don't miss out on your Free £5 Bet every week with Exclusive Partner William Hill HERE!

Rafa To Drop Diame And Set Up 4-4-2 Tonight Versus Norwich

We need a win this evening against Norwich. A loss would see us stuck way back in 9th and already chasing at this stage of the season. For me Rafa has to ditch the disappointing Diame and go with 2 strikers.

Who that is I'm not too fussed. Any combination of Gayle/Mitro/Perez/Murphy will do, as whichever he chooses will be a lot better then Diame 'in the hole'. He's a waste of space in there.

We lack goals from open play this season. A staggering a mouth have come via set pieces which was unheard of in the Pardew years. Even our goal at Villa was an own goal.

We routed QPR for 6 however within that we had a blatant deflection, a wonder strike and then set piece rebounds. We have start creating chances, like at Villa, but converting them.

I'd pick Murphy up top this evening with either Gayle or Perez. The Irishman deserves a chance and could end up being our first choice striker if he plays well and gets a goal or two. The others are just not consistent enough.

This is my team for Norwich if everyone is fit, there's doubts over Yedlin.

For more nonsense like this follow me on Twitter @ToonBano

Official: Allardyce Sacked As England Manager! To Be Replaced By Eddie Howe?

Update on the below!!: BIG SAM HAS BEEN SACKED!

The silence from The FA is deafening right now. No backing of Big Sham. No defence. Not even a 'calm the air' statement. Nothing.

Such silence usually means one thing. He's a goner!

How can he not be? He has brought himself into disrepute with The FA beyond repair. Advising total

strangers on how to get around FA rules to make a quick buck? How stupid do you have to be?

His knowledge, passion and ease of which to advise about the subject makes the assumption he has took part in such schemes himself is obvious. Practice what you preach.

The FA were moronic in hiring Big Sham in the first place for footballing reasons, never mind off the pitch issues. How does Allardyce football fit into the new England DNA? Quick answer, it doesn't.

Someone who does however is Eddie Howe. If ever there was a poster boy for the FA it's the Bournemouth boss. I live down here and have experienced his rise first hand. It has been meteoric. All of which done in a style any organisation would be proud of.

He is the definition of squeaky clean and if you were to have a look over the England DNA, it reads as if it was created by a strand of Eddie Howe's own chromosomes. Football wise and character wise.

Sam's a dead man walking. If you're prepared to get stung before you've even took your first training session, what else is/was he capable of when he actually got his feet under the table?! Staggering.

His lack of any respect for previous manager Roy Hodgson is also embarrassing for the FA. I've been coaching for a bit and all we are told about is the FA 'Respect' campaign. How does Big Sham fit into this?!

You would have no such trouble with Howe. You would have a football team to be proud of with Howe. You would have the perfect poster boy for the future of English football and coaches.

If you offered Eddie the job...he couldn't turn it down.

Brought to you by

For more nonsense like this follow me on Twitter @ToonBano

If Rafa Does Listen To Fans: Drop Sels, Dummett & Diame Immediately!

There's word around town that Rafa does like input from fans and listens to fanzine and a like with what they would do with the team. He has even invited such folk into the training ground and had long discussions talking to them about the team. Well if he is looking for input, then here's some that needs to be actioned ASAP. You need to drop Matt Sels, Paul Dummett & Mo Diame immediately.

Sels was at fault (again) for the Villa equaliser Saturday night as he flapped at a corner and did nothing to stop the ball squeezing in at his near post, to help us throw away 2 points. How we managed to not kill this game off well before the game drifted into the last 15 mins where Villa suddenly woke up, is a mystery and total disgrace.

Dummett has been embarrassing at times this season. I still can't get over someone taking him using theie back at Fulham, first game of the season. Their BACK for crying out loud. His positional sense is all over the place.

Some say he played well at Villa. No, he played well by his own standards. Compare his performance to DeAndre Yedlin and they're in a different league. The young America  is clearly Premier League, our local hero is clearly not.

As for Diame. We look to have got rid of Sissoko and brought in his half brother. What the hell is this man doing in the team week in, week out, home or away? He literally couldn't his a barn door from 6 yards.

Dwight Gayle wasted a one on one that he should have buried, but at least the keeper made a save. Diame was 6 yards out and blazed the easiest chance he will have all season closet to the corner flag.

He's also lazy. I mentioned Sissoko as Diame is looking more like Moussa every time he plays. Is that what Mo is short for? Of all the players mentioned above, he's the one that needs dropping the most.

We have Mitro and Perez on the sidelines where as Murphy can't even get in the squad. The Irishman was very impressive in the EFL cup game last week and deserves a run in the team. He's the one striker we have that knows this division.

Sels has deleted his Twitter account due to ridiculous abuse, I feel for him but that doesn't change the
fact he offers no confidence whatsoever. Can't afford sentiment when promotion is at stake.

Dummett has surely shown Rafa he just ain't good enough. Especially when we have Lazaar waiting for his chance to shine. Even Ciaran Clark is a better option then Dummett. Sick if the sight of his hesitant first touch, just not quite there crossing, off target shooting & non existent positioning. Just get out.

Diame is done. Over.  Get a striker up top with Gayle and let's go for teams more. We have the quality to beat every team, so let's not lose anymore points by being negative or defensive minded. It's unnecessary.

For more nonsense like this follow me on Twitter @ToonBano

Matz Sels Deletes Twitter Account Due To Abuse From Newcastle Fans

Some blame him for the last minute equaliser that cost United 2 points against an awful Aston Villa team. Which is a series of questionable display by the new Newcastle No.1. In such some have had no problem tweeting their views towards him, which has resulted in him having enough and removing himself from social media.

Newcastle keeper Matz Selz has reportedly deleted his Twitter account due to the amount of criticism from Newcastle fans after the Aston Villa game.

I've got to say the criticism he has recieved has been way too harsh and over the top. Of all the players to blame for the dropped two points last night, Matz Sels shouldn't be at the top of everyone's list. Even pointed the finger at the Belgian keeper before mentioning the woeful finishing of Dwight Gayle and Mo Diame.

These two were the biggest reason why we failed to win at Villa park, throwing away some of the best chances we will make all season. Gayle, through one on one, lacked any compsure to recognise how much time he had to do what ever he wanted and fired straight at the Villa keeper. Diame somehow missed from 6 yards with the entire goal in front of him. Shocking the lair of them.

I hope Matz Sels confidence hasn't been totally destroyed by fans on Twitter and elsewhere as at the end of the day, we need him. Whether Darlow should be first choice or not, Sels is a new player and shouldn't be made to feel like he can't look at his Twitter account anymore.

Lots of fans have already tweeted how sorry they are for criticising him but the damage is already done...he won't see any apologies now.

Follow me @ToonBano on Twitter

Newcastle Have Signed A New No.7 And He Will Be A Revelation

The transfer window is slammed firmly shut and Newcastle Utd have themselves a new no.7. The old one was packaged and shipped off for a ridiculous over the top fee, with a new signing set to wear number 7 shirt and he couldn't be any more different to the one that's just left.

New Moroccan left back, come left winger, Achraf Lazaar is quick, skillful and full of enthusiam. Something Moussa Sissoko desperately lacked. Lazaar is also brave. This lad wont hide and wait to see if the game looks like its one he might be able to influence. He will take every game by the scruff of the neck and try to make an impact, everytime.

Lazaar will make mistakes, no doubt. However, give me a player who tries and makes mistakes then one that doesn't try and pretends to be interested. He is all left foot and will look to overlap whoever is playing left wing as much as possible, especially at home, to deliver into the box as well as look to score himself. He may even play left wing himself given how attacking he is. I cant wait to see him in a black and white shirt.

To match we have brought in a new right back to replace the despicable Daryl Janmaat in the shape of ex-mackem DeAndre Yedlin. Again he will be quick, skillful and full of enthusiam. He will also look to get forward as much as possible. The two of them could find themselves as the most forward players on the pitch and crossing to each other this season so holding midfielder Hayden will have a job to do dropping back. Saying that he likes to get forward too!

This team, or should I say completely new team as Benitez has brought in 12 new first team players, is one full of attacking threat from all over the pitch. The full backs will fly forward, the centre midfielders will drive forward and Ritchie will look to win games on his own from the right hand side. We have 4 strikers to choose from. If Rafa stick with 4-2-3-1 he will have a task in picking which one compliments the team the most. Nice problem to have. Visit the William Hill page for the football specials bets including player, manager, team and international ones.

We were all out heavy favourites to win the league before a ball was kicked, as short as 7/4 with some bookmakers, which is ridiculous given how tough the Championship is and no one really knows how a team will shape up after relegation. The first two games made a mockery of those odds as we lost to Fulham and Huddersfield. Three back to back wins has now eased the nerves with fans and players I'm sure. Then there's Rafa.

Speaking of Rafa, what a man. He is already the most popular and respected manager we have had
since Sir Bobby due to his clear understanding of the club and most of all the common sense he has shown. He knows how big this club is and can be so treats it as such. He knows the fans aren't total mugs so he treats them as such. It isn't that hard of a job to have it's just others over the past 12 years have made a pigs ear of it. Mainly down to my first point. They just didn't understand or 'get' what Newcastle Utd is. Rafa does.

Even now you hear 'experts' like Graeme Souness completely spew tired lazy cliches at Sky Sports viewers about how the fans are a drain on the club with too high expectations. Pure nonsense. You hear Big Sam preach how Newcastle think they're a big club but they simply aren't. We think we're as big as we are, nothing more. Why would we? With all the trophies we've won? These men have both managed Newcastle (unsuccessfully) since Sir Bob and even many years later prove they never got it and still don't get it. Idiots pair of 'em.

If you ask 10 fans to pick there current best XI you might get a few that exactly match but most wont. This is due to the squads depth. It isn't just healthy with numbers, its healthy with talent. We genuinely have 2 men for each position, sometimes 3, and it wont effect the team massively. Its one of the most fascinating squads we have had for a number of years. The fact we are in the Championship says a lot to the work Rafa and Charnley have done.

The league wont be a walk in the park just because we have the players and manager in place, if only football was that easy, but we must surely be able rack up the points to finish in the top two at least given the standard of opposition, Brighton were flying and we put them to sword quite comfortably. If that's the opposition, i'll take it.

Saying this we have tough fixture coming up on paper with Derby away, Norwich, Aston Villa and QPR away so if we can get through these games with a healthy amount of points and not more than the one loss, we will kick on this year i'm sure and boss the league. As well as the cups don't forget. A 25 man first team squad gives you options with the cup games we haven't had for years so watch this space for a decent cup run.

Things are looking rosy atm and I'm happy with the signings we have made, none more so then our new no.7. I've got a feeling he is gonna be the shining light out of all of them...just my instinct.

For more nonsense like this follow on Twitter @ToonBano 

Newcastle's Performance Versus Spurs Was The Most Disgraceful Of The Season!

I have never been so angry at a 5-1 win in all my life. Newcastle romped their way through 'the best team in the league' Spurs like a dog on heat, even with 10 men. From this performance comes the blatant question of 'Where the hell have you been all season?!'

Only after we are confirmed as a Championship side do the senior players tagged with the
responsibility of performing decide to show the world what they are capable of? Its a total disgrace on every level. Don't get me wrong I am pleased that Rafa has more to think about when deciding whether to stay or go but he wouldn't be making the decision if we had played anywhere near that on Sunday all season. We would be comfortably a Premier League team.

Even during Rafa's previous 9 games the team didn't have as much desire, drive and overall genuine quality which would have easily brought more points and Premier League survival, so it's not all down to McClaren being totally incompetent (which he was) for the football club finishing 18th in the league. There is no way on earth we are worse then the West Brom's, Crystal Palace and indeed the mackems of this world. Relegation was totally avoidable.

Playing Devil's Advocate you could argue if we were mid-table all season then McClaren would still be here and Rafa would never have come to us. This may be true but as I write this Rafa is speaking to Mike Ashley discussing whether he wants to bother going through a Championship season, working under Charnley and the Fat Man himself which will be one hell of a slog. He knows he will get offers from other Premier League teams with money to spend.

So he might leave us anyway with the likes of Nigel Pearson coming in and lowering our standards to new depths. Lets hope to God Rafa has been persuaded by the Toon Army constantly singing his name and signing a petition as well using up perfectly good bed sheets to persuade him to stay. With him staying, you can expect a strong group of players staying also to play for him. If he goes, expect a mass exodus.

Speaking of a strong group however, the players who put a shift in against Spurs were applauded off the pitch. I would have been more tempted to boo them off and scream 'where have you been all season?' if I were interested in coming anywhere near St James' Park under Ashley's regime. Which I'm not. 9 years and counting my self-imposed boycott has been going and it wont end until Ashley is gone. So the questions burns for following:

Sissoko, Janmaat, Wijnaldum, Mitrovic, Colback & Tiote where have you been when the going got tough? In fact, where were you when the going wasn't even that bad?

Sissoko has scored one goal all season. Once. The captain and leader supreme was man of the match
against Spurs and given a standing ovation as he left the field. I was sick slightly in my throat. Janmaat has been a shambles the year and has even gone AWOL since his 'injury' at Southampton. He conveniently was suddenly fit now that we're down with suitors looking into his signature, didn't he do well?

Gini Wijnaldum has only turned up against the league top teams at home this year. His stats are staggering. 11 goals all at home against Spurs, Man Utd, Chelsea, Liverpool, Southampton (5th) & West Ham (7th). He even went top quality against Norwich and scored 4 in one game. FOUR. Where the hell has this obviously talented player been against the also rans of the Premier League? Where has he been in every away game? He will definitely get his move in the summer and will probably be in the Champions League. Incredible.

We like Mitrovic, that's clear but he demonstrated on Sunday what he is capable of when given good service. He has wasted so many chances this season that his goals tally of 9 is pretty pathetic. This lack of cutting edge has been key in confirming relegation. His header directly against the league's best centre back Alderweireld that made it 2-0, was something he should have been consistently doing all season. There is no excuses of being young, or raw or inexperienced. If you can head the ball like that those things don't come into it. I think he will stay and I hope he finally shows consistency in the Championship. We will need it.

Colback has been a shadow of last season. One reason being McClaren tried to use him purely as a holding midfielder, shackled to only standing in front of the 2 centre backs. This is a poor excuse to be honest. I don't know the full reason why he has made his England call up a joke but since Rafa came in he has looked better. Still no Ginger Pirlo though I'm afraid. The Championship may bring the best out of him.

Now Mr Tiote. He has been decent in the last few games. However he still insists on thinking he is Maradona by trying to take players on in the middle of the pitch, which he inevitably is closed down and dispossessed. He also insists on fouling people for no reason giving away needless free kicks which we struggle to defend against. He cant be ignored however, I don't really care how he's played under Rafa, the bloke down tools and faked injuries all season under McClaren. The man is a disgrace and the sooner he is shipped off to China the better.

I could go through the whole squad but the key men above in the final third (Janmaat is never a
defender) have cost us dear. We couldn't defend under McClaren and had injuries to TWO goalkeepers and other defenders, especially left back, which contributed to our demise. Getting the ball in the net and at least being competitive is the real reason we are down. Weak mentality and gutless cowardice has been shared by all this season and it truly has been a shambles.

Sunday's 'epic' performance and result only showed that even more so in case anyone was in doubt.

Please stay Rafa.

Bring on The Championship.

Follow me @ToonBano

Mike Ashley Will Sell Newcastle Utd For £129 Million

Everyone will know doubt believe Geordies around the globe will be waking up this morning red eyed through tears of dismay or anger with relegation confirmed. I can tell you only some will be, not all.

We are in this situation (again!) ultimately because of one man and one man only, Mike Ashley. His decisions or sometimes lack of decisions over his entire reign have been an absolute abomination. 9 years of total nonsense with a staggering season in the middle in 2011/12.

If Newcastle is ever to get back to what it once was then he needs to go. Its truly as simple as that. So with this FACT, would surviving relegation this year have been the best thing for the club? In true Rafa style, I argue not.

FACT: Relegation only hurts Mike Ashley. He owns the thing. Its his asset.

FACT: He is only still here after 9 years of misery to promote his tin pot sports company through Premier League audiences. Being in the Championship destroys his only reason of owning our proud club. So why would he stay?

FACT: Newcastle Utd is now worth a lot less then it would be in the Premier League, as of next season especially, so finding a buyer at a decent price is a lot more realistic. The £129million debt Ashley has seems about right as the figure to get rid of him. He cant expect a profit. Get his money back and move on.

FACT: He placed the club up for sale for £80 million back in 2009 after the last relegation so has shown he is willing to sell up and leave for good.

FACT: With this in mind, £129 million for NUFC can only be seen as an absolute bargain. Put it this way, an Iranian Investor has just purchased 49.9% of Everton for a reported £100million. Two American Investors have purchased 18% each of Crystal Palace & are looking to spend up to £150 million on the stadium and have already pumped in £50million in capital.

FACT: If Newcastle had survived, we would no doubt be stuck with Mike Ashley for a very, very long time so we would only have to endure his nonsense decision making for the rest of our lives.

FACT: We will never, ever, reach our potential under his ownership. With Rafa or without Rafa. Relegation can bring an end to his tenure a lot quicker.

FACT: The club will never die.

Rafa may stay or he may go. His choice, we will accept it either way.

What we wont accept is Mike Ashley hiring people like Lee Charnley, Derek Llambias or Joe Kinnear.

Who in turn hire people like Steve McClaren, John Carver, Alan Pardew or Joe Kinnear.

Who in turn hire people like Flaurin Thauvin, Remy Cabella, Emmanuel Riviere, Henri Saivet, Yoan Gouffran, Siem De Jong, Seydou Doumbia, Daryl Janmaat, Moussa Sissoko, Papiss Cisse, Cheick Tiote or Joe Kinnear.

Championship football may be the soul destroying chemotherapy that eventually gets rid of the giant tumour that is Mike Ashley. No matter how long it takes. We will have to endure to finally be rid of him for good.

Today could be the start of the end of Mike Ashley's reign of terror and we have Sunderland to thank.

Believe That.

Follow me @ToonBano

Newcastle Isn't Ran Like A Football Club. Its Ran By Yes Men!

For all those wondering in total amazement why Newcastle haven't sacked McClaren yet, the simple answer is because they are not ran as a normal traditional football club.

99% of people see a football club ran as the following: Hire a manager, manager does very badly, manager is sacked - almost purely based on ability of manager and team results.

Newcastle isn't ran like this. The powers that be don't want someone who asks questions or challenges them. They want a 'Yes Man'. That's the main criteria anyone is ever hired at NUFC whether it be in the board room or dugout.

Why do you think Alan Pardew was first brought in after being sacked by a League One team, remained in charge after dreadful seasons, dreadful results and dreadful PR situations?? Because he did what was told and NEVER moaned about it in public. He never demanded transfer money or players to be replaced. Exactly what Ashley, and whoever his 'Yes Man' chairman at the time happens to be, want. Pards headbutted a player for crying out loud!

Why do you think John Carver was put in charge last season and lasted for as long as he did despite losing every single game (practically)?? Because he wouldn't demand anything. Not from his employers anyway. 

Why do you think Joe Kinnear was brought in from the total footballing wilderness....TWICE?! Was he qualified for either role? No, of course not. But Ashley knew him, knew he wouldn't moan at the unbelievable job he had been given, so in he came to total bemusement from everyone.

Looking at it from another way;

Why do you think Joey Barton has his contract ripped up a few years back? Because he questioned the club.
Why do you think the unreal talent of Ben Arfa had his contract ripped up? Because he questioned the manager.
Why was Jonas Gutierrez released after saving them from relegation and overcoming cancer? Because his cancer caused 'an issue' they would much rather not deal with.

Which sums up the way Newcastle Utd football club is ran. The owner and board members don't want to have to make decisions. They don't want the responsibility. The last thing they want or need is to actually have to deal with something.

This is why Mac is still in a job. This is why they put him on the board to begin with. Why is the manager on the board? Do they want him to do everything? The one thing he cant do is manage the football team which causes them a major issue. How the hell can we find someone else who will be able to manage the team but yet not ask us any questions or make any demands....??

This is the mindboggling conundrum the CEO and Ashley find themselves in. The last thing in the world they want to do now is bring in an actual good qualified manager. An outsider. A rogue to their 'Yes Man' party.

Benitez, Moyes, Rodgers = unknown, untrustworthy.

NUFC literally don't have clue what to do right now so will probably just do nothing and wait to see if McClaren can get a result at Leicester.

Jose Mourinho himself could drive up to St James Park, do an interview with Sky Sports News out of his car window declaring he is here to save the day and Lee Charnley will pretend he isn't in and refuse to open his office door.

Charnley: Brenda....! No more calls. Im at lunch!
Brenda: Again?

NUFC is not a football club as we know it. The whole footballing world needs to wake up to this fact.

Follow me on Twitter @ToonBano

Steve McClaren Is No Manager. He's Nothing But A Snide, Gutless, Conman

I've been pretty quiet on the blogging front this season with my many other committments but given our clubs plight, I've woken up. As an aspiring coach myself, I was all for Steve McClaren coming in as I thought he would create a well coached team with a sense of purpose and identity. How wrong I was. Steve McClaren may have all the coaching badges and experience in the world however when it comes to being a manager, he is nothing short of a conman.

His press conferences and interviews after pathetic performances week after week are staggering. I have never known such lack of standards in all my life. He has stated in 8 out of 10 interviews after every defeat claiming we played well. Now he either believes this nonsense or he is given us all the cheap insurance salesman 'sell' to let us know that 'everything's fine'. Neither wash. Big time.

Only now has he come out after 28 games of a totally forgettable inept season and openly turned on his players. The only reason he is doing this is because the fans have openly turned on him. Talk about gutless. The snide arrogance of the man is impossible to stomach. He comes across as slimy when he is being complimentary so you can only imagine what he is like when he isn't. His smirk complete with ridiculous tuft of hair he insist on having makes you sick.

How he still looks at himself in the mirror and calls himself a Head Coach takes some doing. Perhaps 'Coach' is the key word as even he doesn't have the nerve to call himself a 'Manager'. He doesn't have the balls to take on the responsibility of what being a manger is all about. If he did, we wouldn't be in this position. We would either be higher up in the table or he would have quit by now. Hiding behind thee tag of Head Coach keeps his focus on the training field...not St James Park where it counts.

When things go wrong his solution is to 'sort it out on the training ground'. I'm not saying this
is wrong, as many coaches/managers do this, but these other managers always have the primary focus of fixing the problems for the match day performance. Not just to coach the solution at the training ground and declare 'job done, its fixed'. Not at any point have Newcastle Utd fixed anything on the training pitch for the match day performance as we haven't improved in ANY department of the team. If anything we have been getting worse all season. This latest Bournemouth showing proves it.

Not at any stage did we look like winning. We don't defend properly, create enough chances or take the few chances we do create. We haven't all season. That's why we are the worst team outside of Aston Villa. Newcastle Utd are in 19th place in the Premier League after 28 games. We have 24 points. We have never been on this situation before in my lifetime. Even when we went down in 2009 we had more points and were hovering outside the bottom three. This season is a shambles.

Now let me repeat my earlier point of the manager, not Head Coach but managers press interviews this season. 8 times out of 10 he has stated we played well. He even said it last week after Stoke. He said after we had one shot on target in the 93rd minute that we showed fight and quality. He even said it after the Bournemouth game we need to get back to the Stoke performance. What is this man on? Is he actually being serious? Does he have any standards as a manager or what?

No self respecting football manager would even dare claim to have been playing well when you're 19th in the league, fail to score a goal week after week after week after week and show no quality whatsoever. He is a nothing but a conman. He has never been a football manager. Especially in the Premier League and even more at a club the size of Newcastle. Some journalist said he has been out of his depth since day one. I can't disagree. He has conned his way in and has been desperate to convince us all to stay. He's failed.

The performances on the pitch and results to go with it say everything you need to know. Even the most clueless gullable human being can look at the league table and realise things aren't 'going well'. This gutless pretender needs to be removed from his position of huge power and replaced with a genuine Manager who takes responsibility for his and his teams actions on the pitch. Coaches coach Monday to Friday, Managers do this but also manage Saturday and Sunday. It's a 7 day a week job. Something McClaren doesn't have the stomach for.

He can go back to coaching, working with the FA, putting on coaching master classes, speaking to
young up and coming coaches all day long. I have no problem with that. Steve McClaren can teach me a coaching session or two no problem and I will be in his awe. However when it comes to managing a team, no thanks. I think I run my u12s better then he ever could and that is a scary thought considering he has my dream job.

Who to come in next is another question but I would take Benitez, Rodgers or even Moyes to give these lot a kick up the a**e and the true leadership they need. I really don't care which one as long as it's one of them, anyone else would be underwhelming and may not have the impact required. One thing is for sure, McClaren the pretender needs to go. Now.

We have a week till our next game at Leicester. We all know we will be turned over with this current regime so why pretend any longer?

Follow me on Twitter @ToonBano

Finally Official: Newcastle Agree £12million Deal For Andros Townsend

Newcastle have agreed a deal with Spurs of £12 million to bring the Andros Townsend saga to an end. He will no doubt sign a 5 and half year contract worth around £50k a week.

How he will get in the team is up for debate but it will most likely be in place of Ayoze Perez, who McClaren seems to have his doubts over for some bizarre reason that none of us can understand, on the left of a 4-2-3-1 formation with Wijnaldum in behind the misfiring Mitrovic.

Speaking of which, now that this transfer is finally done...can we get a striker now please?!

Image result for townsend
Follow @ToonBano